Things that matter

Years ago I read a short but powerful book, "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff". There was a quote in it that I never forgot those close to me have heard me say it many times over the years, " Ask yourself this question; A year from now will it matter?" I use this when I am going thru tough times to keep me grounded, if it's something that won't matter then it doesn't deserve the energy to worry about. Obviously health is on the top of the that list and until the first week of February it had not come up for me.

 I am one of the fortunate ones that hear the words "you have cancer" and in 2 shorts months hear "you are cancer free". I saw the oncologist today and he doesn't believe it would be beneficial to have chemotherapy. I am fortunate, my cancer was stage 1 with my tumor being stage 2. In layman's terms if I had to get cancer this is exactly the best case scenario. He is confident my surgeon removed all of my cancer and doesn't think there is any part of it left floating around anywhere. The only concern he has is that given my age and not knowing exactly what caused it, I could get a recurrence again. In his opinion the best way to avoid that would be to see him a few times a year and have blood work done to keep on top of it. Also, I will be getting colonoscopy's every year now.
Small trade off for what could have been a much longer and more extensive recovery for me. Again, I am truly one of the lucky ones.

There is however a small trade off (and by small I am being sarcastic). My digestive/colon has a new normal to which I am having challenges on accepting. I will not go in to any detail, although I have had conversations with some of you on this and you know what I'm talking about! I can just say that before having colon resection I took many things for granted in regards to what I ate/drank and how it processed thru my system. I will be participating in a support group(thru Riverside hospital) that I am really looking forward to attending. The group consists of others that had the same procedure and how they handle the daily challenges. I have had a few "feeling sorry for myself" moments regarding this but I keep telling myself I am still here and overall healthy. This is my new normal and I will learn how to live with it.

I have crammed a heck of a lot in the last two months and to say that I've learned from this experience is a major understatement. I am fortunate that thru this I have had the best medical professionals, I will never be able to thank them enough. To me they all seem to do what they do in order to help others, not for the paycheck. And all of you, and the support you have shown leaves me speechless. Thank you, knowing you were all there was a comfort & blessing.

So in closing, when you are going thru a tough time ask yourself if a year from now will this really matter? If it will then it deserves the concern, if not move on and don't give it a second thought.
Your body, listen to what it is telling you. Only you know when things don't seem right and ignoring bad signs do not make them go away. And your family and friends, it's true what they say, you know who your real friends are when things get tough because they are the ones that are there to support you.

Be good to yourselves and enjoy the small stuff. :)

The word for the day is "Remarkable"

Had my appointment today to have the staples removed, not a pleasant experience at all. The good part though was that Dr Wise said I am doing remarkable. :) So good in fact that I will be returning to work 2 weeks ahead of when I previously planned, looks like possibly April 8th. And no that is not me pushing it, the Dr. is the one throwing that out there! I am feeling even better with the staples out and he tells me the difference between how I feel today and how I will feel next week will be huge. So that makes me feel good about the fact I will aggressively continue to feel better. I have been doing everything I was told to do, rest, eat & sleep and of course all of your well wishes & prayers are obviously being heard. I get to start adding things back in to my diet, one at a time to see how my new digestive track reacts to them. I won't be able to lift anything over 5lbs for 6 weeks and as long as I am doing desk work he thinks work would be good for me. It's going to take up to 6 months to get my full energy back but I can adjust to that. I have an appointment scheduled for Friday with the oncologist to get a second opinion on the chemo treatment. Dr Wise said he would like one, I trust whatever he feels is best. How wonderful would it be to hear that I wouldn't need to go through chemo and that in 2 weeks I could start putting this behind me. Either way I will deal with whatever comes next.
I'd like to take this opportunity to thank the many, many friends that have made meals, sent gift cards & words of encouragement. It has made things so much easier for all of us, so much that thank you doesn't seem like enough.
The kids are on Spring break this week and Christian will be coming home tomorrow for a few days. It will be nice to have everyone home as I am recouping. All we need is some nicer weather to make things perfect!

Feeling better

I spent the week doing exactly what I was supposed to do.... rest. It has definitely paid off as I am feeling A LOT better after 2 short weeks. I am getting some weird pains in my stomach as my organs are trying to find their original place, but it doesn't last. Dr warned me that the stairs would be tricky but so far they have been fine, just get a little winded if I go up and down too much. On Tuesday I get the staples out and as much as I thought I'd be happy about that it's almost like a security blanket (knowing I have them there to keep things together). Haley and Christian are on spring break this week, I'm very happy to get to spend some time with them. I can't speak for them, I'm sure they would rather be somewhere warmer and not stuck with their ailing mom! I think a lot of my recovery can be attributed to my "bed company", between Haley, Riley and Max theres barely any room for me. But they sure are cute to cuddle with!

Theres good days and bad days

I can really relate to the phrase "one day at a time" right now. Since my surgery (10 days ago) it has been somewhat of a little roller coaster, as it relates to how I feel. I can go a few days and feel like I'm getting better and then one where I feel like I stepped back. Dr. told me this would happen for a few months so it's no unusual. Yesterday was one of those days, woke up feeling good but by the end of the day not so much. And before anyone thinks it, no I did not overdo it trying to do too much! I am doing exactly what my Dr. has told me I can, no more no less. It can be discouraging if you let it, I am committed to not letting it be. So when I woke up this morning I put yesterday behind me and I am confident today will be better! The sun is shining, it's the first day of spring (even if no one told Mother Nature yet) and also John's birthday. Thank goodness I bought his gift before I had surgery (see it pays to be organized). So Happy Birthday John & Happy Spring!

There's no place like home :)

I was able to come home yesterday, I think the Dr. realized I was way beyond my limit with the hospital stay. He was thinking more along the lines of Sunday but said that when his patients are at the point where they know it's time to go home they benefit more by being there. I had a much better night so I guess that proved his point. Here's a good one, he asked me " do you know what makes a good patient ? one that is patient".   I responded that I never said I wanted to be a good patient.
John and Haley(little mother) have been wonderful. I don't get to do much for myself , and yes I am letting them. John does make some mean scrambled eggs, which seem to be one of the things that agree with my new digestive track. It is really weird how you have to ween yourself back in to food, it's something I didn't even think about. I'm thinking it's going to be awhile before I get to enjoy Mexican food.
 I am thinking Max & Riley missed me a little, Riley is laying on my legs as I type this.  Sweet little boy, he finds a comfortable spot and stays there!

  So for those of you that keep telling me to take it easy and rest, definitely looks like I am, doesn't it?
Christian will be coming home later and staying overnight, it will be good to see him. Even though I saw him on Monday I don't remember too much about the day, go figure. :)
Have a great Sunday everyone!


                                           

Hello everyone

Well I made it through surgery fine, little did I know that would be the easiest part! I ended up with an incision about 10-12 inches long, nice staples. The most wonderful news is that Dr. Wise (surgeon) said lymph nodes were clear, yay me. He wants me to see an oncologist though to get a second opinion on the chemo because of my age and all. I'm good with that, happy to have the little alien out. Not gonna lie though, I've never experience anything like this before. Talk about forcing you to slow down! Heck just picking up a tissue off the floor resembles a Saturday Night Live skit. Apologize for not answering the text or calls, it's been a little tricky to just stay awake. Take care everyone, wishing you good health!

Surgery Update 6pm

Good news!

But for the original tumor, all other organs are good as gold. The doctor did remove several lymph nodes. The pathology on those nodes will not be back for another four days. So we wait and pray on that news.

Christian surprised Cathy and came home from school late last night, even after Cathy said she didn't want him to miss classes. She was already asleep when he arrived so she woke up to an awesome gift before heading to the hospital this morning.

Bad news (sorry...there is a little).

The epidural that was to be in place for the next few days to essentially block her pain? Well, it didn't 'take'. Cathy woke up in recovery almost hanging from the ceiling. The team has juiced her up good with some good stuff but at this point, we have no idea if the epidural will be part of her pain management at all.

I can tell you from personal experience, if Cathy is in pain...the pain is incredibly real. That woman has the pain threshold of a dozen soldiers, I swear.

As I type this, John is on his way to pick up a prepared dinner from their good friends and then heading home to eat with Haley. John's brother, Greg, and Cathy's mom are heading back home after waiting it out at the hospital with John and the kids today.

Thanks to all for following along and offering support. So, go off a celebrate a little tonight in our girl's honor! Say a prayer of thanks. Sleep well knowing she's getting wonderful care.

~The Blog Mistress